paradoxes of parenting pubescents

Today my 13-year-old son and I were at the grocery store, and he bumped into one of his friends whom he hadn’t seen for a while. His friend apparently said to him “Oh yeah, the last time I saw you was when your parents attacked me.” I remember it clearly. We were having dinner and […]

Attachment parenting 20 years later, or “Babywear this!”

When my first child was born 20 years ago, “attachment parenting” was a new and somewhat controversial child-rearing philosophy which involved strict adherence to a demanding set of rules and behaviors including: natural birthing, leaving boys uncircumcised, babywearing, breast-feeding and child-led weaning, co-sleeping, not allowing babies to “cry-it-out”, practicing positive discipline, and so on.  While I didn’t like to put a label on the way I […]

a mid-summer checklist for feral adolescents

As a mother of three adolescents, my attempts at a calm, somewhat detached emotional state are constantly tested by fluctuating sensations of pure joy and total terror.  My extreme emotional reactions are usually in response to their activities and behaviors, or to recollection of my own at their age.  Outside of sitting continuously in meditation, there is no detachment practice strong enough […]

Losing Faith – memories of a childhood friend

In the early seventies my family moved into our first house, a comfortable three bedroom ranch-style house on a quiet street where I would live for the rest of my childhood with my parents and my younger sister Julia.  Living next door was a girl named Faith, who was at least a year older than me, but exponentially wiser.  We […]

lame cliches and other pathetic social networking behavior – a little rant

Here are a few things I am REALLY TIRED of seeing on facebook, in blogs, or blog comments or anywhere else on the web for that matter: -The expression “Wow!  Just wow!”. -The word “snarky”. -The word “hysterical” to describe anything other than that which is TRULY hysterical, which does not include 99% of that […]

That awkward moment…(when you’re 46)

This morning I was wrenched abruptly out of a deep sleep by my wretched cell-phone alarm, just in time to drive my 16-year-old daughter to school.  She was awake when I went to bed and awake when I woke up.  How does she do this?  She’s in the prime sleeping years of her life!  I slogged up the stairs, puffy-eyed, in my […]

aforementioned bedraggled blog post about rule-following by harsh self-critic

“I believe in rules.  Sure I do.  If there weren’t any rules, how could you break them?”   Leo Durocher (American Baseball Player, 1905-1991) Last weekend I was involved in a conversation with a close girlfriend and my boyfriend on the subject of our individual inclinations towards following rules.  It was duly noted by my girlfriend that I […]

my hooptie

“Hit my brakes, out slid Skittles“ – Sir Mix-A-Lot, My Hooptie, 1989 My car has a small piece of a wire hanger sticking out of its front grille that serves as a pull for the latch that opens the hood.  My car is a metallic champagne 1988 Merecedes Benz 300E.  Legend has it that the original owner of this car was the professional basketball player Detlef Shrempf of […]

“You are a life-ruiner!” and other teen hyperbole

I once heard my friend’s teen daughter call her a “life-ruiner” for disallowing her to wear a certain inappropriate outfit to a party she was attending. Wow!  A “life-ruiner”.  Impressive.  If I had a nickel for every time my first child said  “I hate you” as a young teenager, I could buy myself a super fancy pair of ear plugs to wear […]