Two years ago at this time in mid-September, I attended funeral services for a young man named Josh who was the oldest son of family friends and the older brother of a good friend of my youngest son. Josh was 31 and had struggled for a long time with addiction and depression. I don’t know […]
Category Archives: grieving
Today as I’ve done hundreds, probably thousands of times, I washed blood down the drain. But today it was not my own blood that swirled and disappeared. Today it was the blood of my oldest son which stained a gray cotton vest I’ve never seen before. A vest just like the red one his younger […]
“I believe in aristocracy, though — if that is the right word, and if a democrat may use it. Not an aristocracy of power, based upon rank and influence, but an aristocracy of the sensitive, the considerate and the plucky. Its members are to be found in all nations and classes, and all through the […]
A week ago, after his second football game of the season, my thirteen-year-old son climbed into the back seat of his grandparents’ car and sat down next to me. My parents came from out-of-town to watch him play, and he played his heart out for nearly every minute of the game. Fifteen minutes or so […]
Dear Lovely Death Dear lovely death That taketh all things under wing- Never to kill- Only to change Into some other thing This suffering flesh, To make it either more or less, Yet not again the same- Dear lovely death, Change is thy other name -Langston Hughes, 1931 Last Saturday I attended the memorial service […]
All weekend long I thought about the death of Trayvon Martin. I thought about the trial and acquittal of his killer as well, but I thought mostly about Trayvon and his family. I thought about his supporters and the state of affairs in this country for young black males. I read blogs and articles written […]
So we wait to hear the words of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, the 19-year-old suspect apprehended for the Boston Marathon bombings and subsequent spree of murder and mayhem. This kid lies in a hospital bed in serious condition with a throat injury, intubated and sedated, while an elite counter-terrorism team stands by to interrogate him the moment […]
The flyer reads “Celebration of life”. The young caseworker who knew Werner’s father briefly at the end of his life is in charge of this event. On the phone beforehand, she tells me she has only worked here for a short time, and before this, she says, she worked with teenagers, so this is new […]
Most of us have a youthful time in our lives that we look back upon fondly, even if it was fleeting or fraught. This period in our life is often characterized by experimentation, falling in love, creativity, or travel, but mostly by a sense of unbridled freedom and a feeling of endless possibility. This time […]
Yesterday my partner Werner and I visited the small apartment where we are told his father has lived for the past four years. Werner’s uncle called a week ago to tell him that the medical examiner’s office was looking for him because his father had died. Werner was apparently the only known next of kin. […]